From Shame and Fear to Enoughness and Worthiness

We live in a culture of scarcity, where nothing is ever "enough".  We are told we are not pretty enough, wealthy, spiritual enough,  good enough, creative enough, enough of a parent or partner...insert just about anything. Now you may be thinking, I don't hear those words everywhere, but think about it...most of advertising is telling you you don't have enough or won't be good enough until you buy their product. Shaming behavior, which is prevalent in our cultural, is all about telling others they are not worthy enough. Once you are aware of this issue scarcity in our culture you begin to see it everywhere and you be begin to notice the effect it is having on out society and on your self.

I struggle with not feeling worthy enough. This feeling of not being worthy enough is at the root of my struggles with fear and shame. Somedays these struggles paralyze me to the point of not being able to accomplish task, not taking a risk I would like to take or not being and ultimately not being able to be be my authentic self. Some days are easier than others-somedays (like today) I have the courage to be authentic and speak my truth. Other days I struggle just to make it through the day without spiraling downward into the negative thoughts that seem to be on auto repeat in the depths of my mind.

The Good News is that there is hope for all of us, because EVERYONE struggles with the "not enough" feeling at some point/s during our lives. The Good News is that we are good enough and worthy enough.

"God is the reminder of our divine worthiness."

Brene Brown

God is the reason we are worthy and good enough. We are created in the divine image of God, meaning we are part of God and God lives within each of us. When we deny our worthiness and our enoughness we deny that which is of God. They question then becomes how do we trust and have faith in our worthiness and enoughness?

We start by being grateful. We practice gratitude. We take time each day to intentionally make ourselves aware of what we have and who we are-that for which we are grateful. This may take the form of a gratitude journal, a family practice of sharing what we are grateful for with one another, creating a collage of gratitude or any other way you may intentionally become aware of what you are grateful to God for.

We also show compassion for ourselves and for others. Showing compassion for ourselves is about being gentle with ourselves. We tend to be harder on ourselves for things we do or who we thing we are than we would be on others. Compassion for ourselves means giving ourselves space to make mistake, forgiving ourselves for things we are regret doing, and being intentional gentle with ourselves when our instinct is to tear ourselves apart.

Just practicing gratitude and compassion on a daily basis can transform our fear and shame into courage and joy! 

Questions for reflection:

In what areas of your life do you feel unworthy or not enough?

In what areas of your life to you feel shameful or afraid?

How might you begin to practice gratitude and/or compassion?

Where do you feel joy in your life? 

I'd love to hear YOUR story and/or walk with YOUR on your journey! Please contact me for more information!

Spiritual Practice-Gratitude Journaling

I decided to jump on the Thanksgiving bandwagon and write a post about thankfulness or in this case gratefulness. Now don't get me wrong it's not that I'm not thankful or grateful but this year I don't feel the need to broadcast these things on Facebook or social media. In fact this post isn't going to focus on what I'm thankful. However, I do want to take this time to say THANK YOU to YOU the readers of this blog! I am grateful that you take the time to read, ponder, and respond to what I write. It gives me courage and inspires me to continue this blogging journey.

Okay so back to the main purpose of this post. I have a spiritual practice of gratefulness. I try to each day to be intentional about naming the things I'm grateful for. Some days I just take a few minutes to name them in my head. Other days I write them down as part of my pray journaling practice. Some days I even post them on Facebook or Instagram. This practice is usually just a list of people, things or events. In the past few days I have to feel the need to reflect on my gratitude on deeper level. I have felt the need to challenge myself to not only name what I'm grateful for but also to put into words why I am grateful that particular day for that person, place, item or event. This might include reflecting on how this positively impacted me or where/how I experienced God's love. This will take more time than just making a list. Yet, I believe it will open up my heart and soul for glimpses of God's healing and transforming love.

For Advent I am going to commit to putting this into practice by keeping a gratitude journal. Each day not only will I name what I'm grateful for but will reflect and write down why I'm grateful for the things I name. I also commit to reflecting on this experience in a blog post after Christmas.

So who wants to join me in this gratitude challenge? I would love to have others along on this journey with me and to hear what you noticed about yourself while engaging in this spiritual practice.

Here are some question to ponder as you reflect on the "why":

• How did this person, event, or thing positively effect my life today?
• How am I different because of this?
• How did I experience God's healing and transforming love today?
• What about the person, event, or thing made me feel grateful?

Who's with me?!